Star Wars Ep7 Spoiler free review

17 12 2015

Seriously. Spoiler free. Unless you never saw a trailer and don’t know that Star Wars has lightsabers and such in it in which case it’ll blow your fucking mind.

It is good.

Alright alright I’ll do some more but its not easy. There is no stupid huge plot twist. There just isn’t. Which is good in case you were wondering. The story feels like the old movies. The effects feel like the old movies. The new actors fit right in with the old ones. Its like it just went on without Episodes 1 to 3 ever existing. Like the originals just bigger. And not even in the “we have to try so hard to make it seem bigger” way so many new movies have to work. It starts relatively modest. No huge fleet battles or anything like that. But man those crashed old Imperial war machines on a planet realy show just how gigantic that stuff was supposed to be. So let’s just do this with some bulletpoints for a quick overview:

  • Old actors are great, pull their weight and do not steal the spotlight
  • New cast is fantastic.
  • New villain organization is great. Like the Empire on crack.
  • The new Vader standin main badguy is shit. I mean realy shit. He is so bad he makes emo Anakin seem genuinely good. That he doesn’t manage to ruin the movie is not thanks to him but only because the rest is so solid. You thought the crossguard lightsaber was stupid? Believe me, that is NOT his problem.
  • Attention to detail is amazing, little jokes that are actualy funny and not too forced all over the place. Colorful aliens, silly droids, the whole package.
  • This is sort of covered by the above but nothing looks like shitty CGI. This movie looks so real its almost painful.

crashed.jpg

I’m putting this at the end since I don’t want it to overshadow the movie itself but its huge. This movie is the single most equal opportunity main holliwood blockbuster that exists. Neanderthals who believe “social justice warriors” are a real thing will lose their shit over this. Some little girls who like Star Wars will be thrileld beyond words. Marvel Studios looks like they got caught with their pants down for their white boys club of main characters. I’ll put most of this in a seperate entry to not make it seem like the movie is about that. Which is the truly special thing. Its not. It does not make a big deal about any of it. A long time ago in a galaxy far far away people of any race or gender can be in any role and its not big deal to anyone.

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